Domestic Violence

Here's a scary statistic that I found in the newspaper that lines the bottom of my cage. I thought I'd misread it  at first because there was quite a bit of cucumber juice plastered over it. Apparently I'd trodden on the cucumber while searching for a bean that I was sure I'd seen lying around the day before. Anyway, here's the statistic. One in three women in Australia has experienced domestic violence. One in three! Ladies, that means that if you go out for coffee or a meal with half a dozen of your friends, two of your group is likely to have been assaulted by a family member. If you have twelve women in your workplace, four of them may have had the bush chocolate beaten out of them by their husband, father or brother. This is not Saudi Arabia or Afghanistan. This is Australia in 2012. It gets worse too. The same newspaper article stated that one in five women in Australia has experienced sexual violence. What on earth is going on out there in this outwardly easy going nation.

I've heard people saying on our new telly that Australia is a racist country. I disagree. Australia doesn't appear to be any more racist than any other nation, less so than many. Especially if you discount a few politicians who attempt to revile immigrants and refuge seekers for their own political ends, in the hope that some of the less sophisticated members of the electorate will vote for them. Look up "less sophisticated" in your pigtionary. The definition is - Thick. Stupid. Bigoted. (See Barnaby Joyce).

 However, there can be little doubt that Australia is a misogynist society. How else can those figures be explained away. Badger and I can see misogyny in the way that women in power are treated. Yes, I know we have a female Prime Minister, but she has to put up with derogatory personal comments that no male politician ever has to. Her hair, her shape, her shoes, the way she dresses, the fact that she is not married, the way she speaks. Okay, she tells lies - she's a politician, get over it humans. John Howard, George Dubya and Toe-Knee Blair also told lies. Much, much bigger lies with far reaching consequences for the lives of millions pf people, but nobody ever whined about their choice of shoes or the fact that their blouse didn't match their skirt. The saddest thing is that many of those whines come from women who really should know better. Maybe it's due to some kind of abuse induced inferiority complex. I'm just a guinea pig, how should I know?

Anyway, I have a theory as to why so many women are abused. It's because animal abuse is not taken seriously enough. "Is this piggy mad?" I hear you cry. "Has Billy been ranting on about misogyny only to finish by comparing women to animals?" Certainly not, there's no comparison. We animals are far superior in almost every way to humans - male or female, though I admit we find it hard to make a decent cappuccino. What I'm saying is that early signs of violence in males often manifests itself in the form of animal abuse. There needs to be a zero tolerance approach to animal cruelty. Not just a slap on the wrist to some brat found beating their dog or torturing the neighbour's cat. It has to be made clear to you humans at an early age  that such cowardly behaviour towards the defenceless and the vulnerable is not acceptable. Maybe then we'll start to see those horrendous statistics move in the right direction.

I bet you didn't realise that I'm a feminist did you? It's hard to imagine a feminist whose testostricles drag along the floor when he runs, and who spends most of his time plotting to mount his best mate.Nevertheless I firmly believe in the equality of the sexes. My female staff is just as capable of chopping my vegetables as my male staff. Her cuddling skills are just as good, though her foot massaging has yet to reach the heights of those offered by Uncle Dan from Iowa. She trims my fur reasonably well. Certainly far better than my male staff who left a bald batch the size of a football field on my butt last time he did it. She cleans up my bush chocolate with as much alacrity as my male staff and certainly contributes more money to the household coffers than he does, enabling the purchase of vegetables and treats for Badger and I to consume. For these reasons I will be the first to bite my male staff's tender parts should he ever raise a finger against my female staff. On the other hand, my female staff is welcome to continue kicking and elbowing my male staff "in her sleep" just so that he knows who's the boss.

BADGER'S FOOTNOTE
Billy's testostricles really do drag along the floor when he runs. He has to kick them along like a Premier League footballer.