Thursday, June 2, 2011

Over-Sexed Rogues

Well, I'm nearing the end of my short stay in Olde England and I've come to the conclusion that despite what you might imaging from watching Hollywood movies not all Englishmen are utter prigs with a stainless steel rod up their bottom passages like most of Colin Firth's characters. Neither are they lovable, over-sexed rogues like most of Hugh Grant's characters, indeed like Hugh Grant himself from what I can tell. No, many Englishmen are total nutters like my male staff. His sister is something of a fruitcake too, although this can come in handy sometimes. Like the time she, her husband and my staff's dad went to an airshow. With my staff's dad driving they pulled up next to the man taking the entrance money. My staff's sister was pulling faces at her husband, something she does quite a lot apparently. The nice man taking the money assumed she was intellectually challenged - a quite understandable error, and gave her a free pass. He also assumed that her husband was her carer and charged him half price. My staff's dad is a senior citizen and so he was also entitled to half price. So all three of them got into the airshow for the price of one. Sometimes it pays to be slightly deranged.

Another thing I've noticed about the British is that they've stopped sending their criminals to Australia and started electing them to parliament. Here's an interesting statistic for you. 0.14% of the British general public are in prison. 0.6% of Members of Parliament are in prison according to Private Eye. So, Members of Parliament are four times more likely to be convicted of a criminal offence than the general public. Dozens of MPs and Peers who sit in the House of Lords have been found guilty of rorting their very generous parliamentary expenses - some have gone to prison. The latest greedy bastard to go to jail is Conservative peer Lord Taylor of Warwick.  He fiddled the British tax payer out of eleven thousand pounds in false travel claims. The funny thing is that the House of Lords has no regulation of expense payments as Peers are considered to be above such swindling. Who voted against having these regulations? Yep - the Peers themselves.

Not only have the British stopped sending their criminals to Australia, but Australia has started sending it's criminals to Britain. Forty seven year old Clifford Tucker had lived in Australia since he moved from Britain with his parents at the age of six, but her never took Australian citizenship. He only held permanent resident status. In the eighties and nineties he was jailed for violent crimes but he hadn't been in prison since 1999.
Now, the Aussie authorities may have been within their rights to kick this guy out, but don't you think it smacks of shirking their responsibility. This bloke is effectively an Australian. He obviously learned his criminal ways in Australia since he'd been there since he was six years old. Do you think it's fair to him or the British that this Aussie criminal should be dumped in Britain - a country he has absolutely no connection with other than his birth forty seven years ago?

One last thing. I've just been watching the BBC news coverage of the battle for the USA's Republican presidential candidate. OMG! Mitt Romney or Sarah Palin? What a choice. Mitt has all the personality of screwdriver and Sarah has the brains of a ............... Republican presidential candidate. Good luck guys.   

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